So you know the kind of semi-hip food establishment where smug tattooed employees write obscure pop culture trivia questions on their chalkboard menu and if you answer it correctly you get some utterly insignificant discount on your order? I totally knew the answer to one of those yesterday! And its original title!!! Thanks, Wesleyan Film Festival. My college education finally paid off big time. Unfortunately, I only noticed the question after I had paid in full. I knew it was too good to be true.
But don't worry, I'm not the beret-wearing excellent rememberer I make myself out to be. Why, just last week I managed to drive straight through our car's 123456th mile without even noticing. Which wouldn't be at all sad or pathetic if I hadn't spent LITERALLY WEEKS in eager anticipation of this momentous event. (No, for real. Every time I got into the car I would look at the odometer in gleeful anticipation. It takes SO LITTLE to entertain me it's truly amazing.) This is really only my second car, and Briana and I have the blurry illegible photographs and the epic story to commemorate my first car's 123456 - it's a tradition! This time I didn't quite go the Peter Mulvey route of resetting the mileage counter 789 miles before 123456, but I did reset it 78.9 miles in advance and threatened Richard with everything from divorce to certain death if he so much as touched it. Then the big day came, except I didn't realize it was the big day, and didn't actually remember it again until it was 4 miles too late. FOUR MILES. FOUR. MILES. FOUR. I don't think anyone except Briana can fully understand the scope of this tragedy.
In conclusion, I mostly don't remember anything.