Wednesday, June 29, 2011

eating nonfood keeps them mean / but they're young forever

Drag prom! This photo is marginally more awesome than the one I put on Facebook only because you can see J's sheets in it, which match my Richard's tie to perfection (as well as Carly's beautiful handwoven cuff, which you can't actually see in this picture but just imagine it). I feel like it's all very Berlin-brothel-fabulous.

It's clearly time to blog because a) I finished my last stats exam this morning! and b) apparently Rebecca just posted. And we are nothing if not creepily prone to deciding to blog during the same 24-hour window after weeks of not saying anything.

So it turns out that procrastinating on your homework is actually as poor an idea as it was the last time I was in school. Haven't they managed to invent a way to make that not a bad idea yet? I spent the past five days doing pretty much nothing in my spare time except catching up on homework and studying for three tests. When I fell asleep I saw P-values and critical intervals floating before my eyes. (No for real. I did. It was sort of charming and awful at the same time.) And then it all paid off when I took my last exam this morning and remembered the amazing amazing feeling of being a student who's DONE WITH CLASS... it's almost sweet enough to make me decide that applying to grad school isn't a terrible idea. It's a better idea than blogging instead of doing homework, I'll give it that, but I still have my doubts.

Anyways, yeah. Being a student again. That was weird. Although I did slip back into the role disturbingly easily... all my old staying-up-late skills came back with a vengeance, and I remembered how to draw boxes around my homework answers like a pro. I even passed a note to a friend today. Like, an actual note on a piece of notebook paper! 8th grade Katie would have folded it into one of those awesome triangles where you tuck the ends into themselves, but whatever, I had to draw the line somewhere.

So yeah, one more day of work, one happy hour date, some final packing, and in 31 hours I'm Massachusetts-bound! Woo! I'll leave you all with a highly seasonally inappropriate picture of my destination. Good night!

visitors, and blogging by proxy

Wow, I suck as a blogger. Let's let a couple other folks pick up the slack, hmm? Fortunately, this has been a good month for visitors! First up was our only blog sibling, Mr. Dan Mahoney! He braved Ayn Rand, socializing with strangers, evil United computers, and brunch with meeeee! I got to eat pancakes with three ex Brown fencers and talk about people getting married and having babies, like we're some kind of grown ups or something. Then I sent them on their way to pick up ninja turtle cake toppers*. This is a wedding I can get behind. For full coverage, I highly recommend you see here. SPOILER ALERT: I give Dan the best. book. ever.

Next was my daaaaaaad! We had amazingfuntimes as usual, mostly involving OMGsomuchgoodfood. I kind of don't remember how to feed myself after he comes to town. Also, we went cherry picking! Here's Stu with a full cherry belly.

Cue my alter ego. I'll let her ramble about cherries and quote excessively from a children's classic.

* Overheard in Bookstore
Little Kid pointing at DVD: Are they bad guys?
Mom our age-ish: No, honey, those are the Ninja Turtles.
Kid: So, they're the good guys?

Sunday, June 12, 2011

But no one will ever see my poem

Hi guys! Thank god Katie's been in a stats-induced procrastination phase or this blog would be even more echo-y lately.

I just read a book about Writers, which never ever fails in making me yearn to be a Writer. This one happened to about angsty teen (ziiiiiiiiine!) writers, so I felt completely justified in writing my very own angsty teen poem, and even more justified in snickering at it. Then I remembered that I have a blog where I can blog instead of trying to Write, so here I am.

If you didn't know, I have this kind of ongoing existential crisis wherein I wish I could write pretty words instead of just read them, but I just ain't a born writer. Writers are always talking about having a compulsion to write from a hyperbolically young age, and writing lots of crap for years before they ever wrote anything worthwhile. That really really really does not describe me. I am a born reader and a born singer, but I've never kept a journal and never written anything creatively that wasn't assigned. I really wish I could blame my fourth grade teacher who gave me a D or something ridiculous on a totally awesome time travel story I wrote, but it didn't actually crush my creative spirit or anything. Anyway. Do you think there's a way to become a born-again writer? That doesn't involve, you know, putting in a lot of work?

In other media news, after being sick a zillion times this spring, I finally ponied up for a netflix account so I could stare at the teevee while hacking. Mostly so I could watch BSG, which I inhaled until it completely lost me at the beginning of season 3. (Did it jump the shark, or should I not lose faith?) Also Katie and I have a mini gay film festival going (I don't think film festival means what we think it does.) As she alluded to, this blog heartily endorses Plan B. Go forth and watch, and you too can join in with our highly cultural discussion obsessive googling of unknown Argentine actors!


Don't worry, I just have more homework to do. Or not do, clearly.

I'm on the chapter about ethics in scientific experiments, so I figured I'd take this opportunity to examine some ethical quandaries in my own life...

ETHICAL QUANDARY 1: My friend's theater collective is hosting a drag prom fundraiser later this month. I plan on going with some friends, and I also told two of my interns about it. Neither of them is quite of legal drinking age yet. Bearing in mind that this is a) a DRAG PROM, people, and b) organized by bunch of drama queens, I am working under the assumption that if said interns attend, they will have no difficulty procuring alcohol. If that's the case... am I responsible for making sure they have a way to get home safely? I mean, they're 20, it's not like they're 13 - but I did invite them. Please design a scatterplot illustrating the relationship between the interns' level of intoxication and my responsibility for them, and determine a formula for the least-squares regression line that will predict at what point I will be obligated to take their keys away and find them a designated driver. [Editor's note: I'm not quite actually nerdy awesome enough to create a fake scatterplot based on this blog post, so I just cut and pasted one I'd already created for my homework. But isn't it purty?]

ETHICAL QUANDARY 2: Is it morally reprehensible for me to be obsessed with Andrej Pejic even though he's only 19? But I mean seriously, can you blame me?

2a: On a related note, I recently rewatched But I'm a Cheerleader and realized to my horror that I'm almost definitely too old to find teenage Clea Duvall hot anymore. OH THE HUMANITY.

2b: The other day in class I was chatting with my new friendship (whenever we have to do partner work our teacher always tells us to "Make a friendship! Talk to your friendship! Figure out what the answer is!") who's probably in his early 20s, and I made a joking reference to doing such-and-such "now that I'm old," to which he made one of those feeble polite social protests, like "No no, you're not..." Wait what??? Wasn't that supposed to be a joke??? As it turns out, I'm now so old that people in their early 20s feel the need to reassure me that I'm not so old. Nice. It actually gives me a new feeling of power and authority. DEFER TO MY WISDOM, WORLD.

ETHICAL QUANDARY 3: When R goes backpacking in Colorado later this month, is it acceptable for me to do all the things he usually tells me not to do, like eat in the bedroom and turn the air conditioning down two degrees? (Please send all responses to me privately. I suspect he's monitoring this blog.)

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Homework break!

So I'm taking a blogging break in the middle of catching up on statistics homework, which makes me all kinds of nostalgic for the excessive timewasting I used to accomplish back in my actually-needing-to-do-homework-all-the-time days. Ah, those halcyon years when Rebecca was always next door and couldn't be happier to help me not write that French paper. However, the bright side of taking four years of humanities classes is that math homework is SO SATISFYING. You answer problems, you get some numbers, either they're right or they're wrong and there's nothing you can do about it, and BAM you're done. Brilliant! No trying to figure out the best way to make that elusive point, no skimming novels you haven't read even though you're supposed to discuss them in class tomorrow, no IMing Rebecca the terrible thesis statement you just wrote because it's 4am and you can't manage to write anything that's not hilarious. Also, I get to answer problems with titles like "Thin monkeys, fat monkeys." Why wasn't I an Intro to Statistics major???

(Also, bonus points because my teacher is from Argentina just like my new favorite movie! Plus he says enjoyable things like, "I won't be grading your tests until this weekend. In order to grade I need my couch. And my cat.")

In other news... the countdown has begun for East Coast Extravaganza 2011! I even finally bought a new laptop (literally the first computer I've ever owned that wasn't a hand-me-down or a shared machine... oooooooooohhhhhhh so shiny) in preparation for the "working remotely" that is my excuse for taking a GIANT-ASS vacation and leaving my poor interns to their own devices for three weeks. (Ironically, one of them is only in Texas for 10 weeks to intern with us, and normally lives in Westfield.) Somehow I just have to sweat it through the rest of June. So. Much. Sweating.

Okay, bedtime. I look forward to further communicating with you all at a future date in between calculating monkey fat.

Friday, June 03, 2011

I can totally make it till October, I can totally make it till October, I can totally make it till October...

As we roll into my least favorite season, I am making an effort this year to stay positive. Not a guarantee. So anyways, here without further ado I present to you:

Ten Nine Things About Texas Summer That I Love Usually Remember Not to Be Entirely Ungrateful For:

1) The honey in my giant honey jar never solidifies and always pours like a dream.

2) Getting out of the shower is entirely painless because the bathroom is never cold.

3) We always know what the weather is going to be like tomorrow (99 degrees and humid) so we never have to think about what to wear.

4) Sweating isn't embarrassing because everybody does it.

5) Frozen margaritas.

6) If I time it right I can cycle 2-3 loads of laundry on and off the clothesline in a single day, and have everything be dry.

7) We can go on vacation to other places that are actually beautiful during the summer and not feel like we're missing anything.

8) My bread rises really fast.

9) Frozen margaritas.

10) I ran out of things.